HMGOV.UK
The best place to find absolutely no useful information.
Forgot to submit your taxes?
If you forgot to submit your taxes by the January 31st deadline - please submit an emergency request below to have your request looked at and ignored, by the end of February, guaranteed.
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Services and information
Opt out of your taxes
It really is as easy as filling out this form.
Vote to give away United Kingdom Territory
We don't have to stop with Chagos. Together, we can decide what else to give away. Vote here to guarantee you're heard.
Department of Resurrections
Have you lost a loved one before their time? Submit a request to have their body resurrected for up to 24 months
Steak Pensions
Entirely or partially convert your pension into a new Steak Pension, granting weekly meat deliveries to your primary address
Arranged Marriages
Submit your request for a state arranged partner here
Leaving the Planet
File your request for temporary or permanent planetary leave
Common Answers For Common People
Why have my bins not been collected?
Missed your bin collection time? Submit a request to be ignored here.
Why Is My Car Not Starting?
A guide on how to ensure your car is compliant when facing starting issues
Who do I report a pothole to?
A complete guide to getting potholes noticed, flagged for resolution and aimed to be filled within a calendar decade.
Why are there roadworks on every road at once?
Rest assured, highway maintenance are on their way!
Why is there a cone outside my house?
This seemingly-innocent scenario could put you in imminent danger.
Can I reduce my tax by bricking up my windows?
Believe it or not, we are asked this on a weekly basis.
Why is my council house cold?
A short guide on explanations, excuses and an exceptional lack of answers.
Do I need planning permission for a trampoline?
Tackle the complexities of outdoor planning rights and permissions relating to temporary tension structures